THAT'S ALL WE NEED... AND THAT'S ALL I MAY HAVE

SO, HERE IS THE LATEST UPDATE... I WAS HAVING A HORRIBLE DAY ON FRIDAY. I HAD TO DROP MY CLASSES FOR THIS SEMESTER BECAUSE I HAVE BEEN REALLY OVERWHELMED AND STRESSED LATELY WHICH CAUSED ME TO FALL REALLY BEHIND. RATHER THEN HAVE MY GPA FALL I WITHDREW. SO THAT IS GONNA SET ME BACK SOME. ANYWAY WHEN I CAME OUT OF SCHOOL I HAD A MESS AGE FROM THE RE. THE GOOD NEWS WAS MY PAP CAME BACK FINE. THE BAD NEWS... THE MIS RESULTS. ACCORDING TO THE DOC, SHE IDEALLY WOULD LIKE A PATIENT TO HAVE A MINIMUM EGG COUNT OF .4 FOR IUI. I AM AT .27 - I AM NOT GOOD AT MATH BUT CLEARLY THIS IS NOT A GOOD NUMBER. SHE WENT ON TO SAY THAT SHE WAS SURPRISED IT WAS SO LOW... SHE WAS SURPRISED?!?! WTF??? I AM THE ONE THAT IS FUCKING SURPRISED. ANYWAY, THE MESSAGE SAID THAT EVEN THOUGH DAWN AND I MADE IT CLEAR THAT IVF IS NOT AN OPTION FOR US, IF WE CHANGE OUR MIND, SHE FEELS WE WOULD BE BETTER SUITED FOR IVF THAN IUI, WE SHOULD MAKES MOVES SOON BECAUSE AS TIME PASSES MY EGGS DECREASE AS DO MY CHANCES (CUE THE TEARS RUNNING DOWN MY FACE WHILE ON THE BUS) SHE SAID IF WE STILL WANTED TO GO THROUGH WITH THE IUI WE COULD WITH OR WITHOUT THE MEDS - AND WE DON'T EVEN NEED TO MAKE ANOTHER APPOINTMENT TILL I HAVE MY 2ND DAY BLOOD TEST DURING THE CYCLE WE CHOOSE AND TO JUST MAKE SURE THE SWIMMERS ARE THERE AND THAT WE HAVE TAKEN THE IUI CLASS. SOOO, I HANG UP AND SOB, STILL ON THE BUS. I GET HOME @ 2 AND TEXT DAWN WHO WAS STILL AT WORK - AND WAITED FOR HER TO GET HOME. WE DECIDED TO GO FORWARD AS PLANNED BUT I HAVE TO SAY I AM FEELING A LITTLE DEJECTED AND LIKE I HAVE ALREADY LET DAWN DOWN. WE ARE SHORT ON EGGS BUT I AM SURE THE ONES WE HAVE ARE GOOD ONES AND WILL DO JUST FINE. DID THAT SOUND CONVINCING ENOUGH? ANYBODY ELSE HAVE THIS # PROBLEM BUT HAVE SUCCESS WITH IUI?

update - more crappy news than good

OK, SO HERE IS THE LATEST UPDATE. ONLY SOME OF MY TEST RESULTS ARE BACK. MIS AND PAP RESULTS ARE STILL NOT IN. THE DOCTOR CALLED ME YESTERDAY AND TOLD ME THAT I AM ANEMIC... SEVERELY ANEMIC. I NEED TO TAKE EXTRA IRON AS WELL AS PRENATALS. ALSO, I HAVE TO REPEAT MY CBC BLOOD WORK. MY PLATELET AND WBC COUNTS WERE OFF. SO BACK I GO ON MONDAY TO GET MORE BLOOD TAKEN... HELLO, I AM ANEMIC, DON'T I NEED TO KEEP MY BLOOD???!?!! I AM ALSO CMV- , SHE SAYS THIS MEANS SHE WOULD PREFER IF WE PICK A CMV- DONOR, BUT THAT WE DON'T HAVE TO. APPARENTLY MOST PEOPLE TEST CMV+ SO WE'LL SEE IF OUR CHOICES ARE LIMITED EVEN MORE BY THIS LITTLE BIT OF NEWS. SHOULD BE ANOTHER WEEK OR SO BEFORE I HAVE THE OTHER RESULTS... WHAT HAPPENED TO I SHOULD HAVE THEM ALL BACK IN 2 WEEKS?!?!? ANYWAY, I AM TOTALLY PMSing AND I HAVE HAD A REALLY SHITTY TIME LATELY SO EXCUSE THE CRANKY ASS BEHAVIOR. HOPE ALL IS WELL FOR EVERYONE ELSE OUT THERE IN BABYMAKING LAND.

just another day in the life

SO THE OTHER DAY I RECEIVED A LETTER IN THE MAIL FROM MY INSURANCE WITH SOME INFO ON INFERTILITY COVERAGE. IT LISTED A WHOLE BUNCH OF THINGS THAT I AM APPROVED FOR SUCH AS ULTRASOUNDS AND MEDS AND TESTS. HOWEVER, I HAVE TO DO THE THINGS LISTED BY THE END OF DECEMBER. I AM FEELING A LITTLE RUSHED. WE WERE HOPING TO BE ABLE TO DO THINGS NICE AND SLOW WITH THE RE SO WE CAN GET A GOOD GRASP ON EVERYTHING SHE SAYS. I GUESS WE HAVE TO PICK UP THE PACE. ANYWAY, YESTERDAY I WENT FOR A PAP (EWW AND OUCH) AND MORE BLOOD WORK (I SWEAR SHE USED AN ICE PICK AND A BUCKET). ANYWAY, SO NOW WE WAIT FOR THE RESULTS OF THE MIS TEST, THE PAP AND CULTURES AND THE MULTITUDE OF BLOOD WORK SHE DID YESTERDAY (SHE TOOK 7 VIALS PEOPLE, AND ONE OF THE THINGS SHE IS CHECKING IS ANEMIA) AS FAR AS DONORS GO, CCB ONLY HAS 12 WHO MEET OUR BASIC CRITERIA AND OF THOSE 3 ARE OUT OFF THE BAT AND 1 DOESN'T HAVE ANYTHING AVAILABLE RIGHT NOW - SO WE HAVE 8 THAT WE HAVE TO LOOK THROUGH AND DECIDE FROM OR WE CAN TRY AND WAIT IT OUT A LITTLE LONGER TO SEE IF THE CHOICES GET BETTER. IN THE MEANTIME, I HOPE ALL IS WELL WITH ALL OF YOU AND YOURS . MUCH LOVE AND HAPPINESS AND LOTS AND LOTS OF POSITIVE VIBES TO ALL OF YOU.

you are not alone - REALLY LONG POST

SOOOO.... HERE IS WHAT HAPPENED AT OUR FIRST RE APPT YESTERDAY. I CALLED THE DAY BEFORE TO DOUBLE CHECK MY TIME, I WAS TOLD 2 PM AND TO BE THERE HALF HOUR EARLY. DAWN MET ME IN THE CITY AND WE WALKED OVER TOGETHER. I HATE BEING LATE SO WE GOT THERE A FEW MINUTES AFTER 1PM. WE GO IN AND WE ARE TOLD TO GO TO ANOTHER FLOOR... OK, NO BIG DEAL. WE GET TO THE FLOOR WE ARE SUPPOSSED TO BE ON AND I AM TOLD THAT MY APPOINTMENT WAS FOR 2:30 NOT 2 AND THAT THE DOCTOR WILL NOT SEE ME BEFORE THEN. OK, SO WE HAVE TO WAIT ALMOST AN HOUR AND A HALF, A LITTLE UPSETTING BUT WE DECIDE TO MAKE THE BEST OF IT AND SIT AND TALK. ABOUT 2:05 THE RECEPTIONIST, WHO HAS HAD ALL MY PAPERWORK AND INSURANCE INFO, CALLS ME OVER TO ASK IF I HAVE A REFERRAL - I TELL HER THAT I CONTACTED MY INSURANCE BEFORE I EVEN MADE THE APPOINTMENT AND THEY TOLD ME THAT LIKE OB/GYN VISITS I DO NOT NEED A REFERRAL FOR CONSULT AND INITIAL EXAMS FROM AN RE... I ONLY NEED REFERRALS FOR TREATMENT. SHE LOOKS AT ME LIKE I AM CRAZY AND TELLS ME SHE WILL HAVE BILLING LOOK INTO IT BEFORE I GO IN TO THE DOCTOR. AT 2:15 THE WOMAN FROM BILLING CALLS ME OVER AND HANDS ME A PIECE OF PAPER - SHE TELLS ME THAT MY INSURANCE WILL COVER DIAGNOSIS AND CORRECTION OF INFERTILITY AS WELL AS IUIs BUT I HAVE TO CALL THEM TO REGISTER WITH THEIR INFERTILITY DEPARTMENT FIRST AND GET AN AUTHORIZATION NUMBER. WHY IN THE HELL DIDN'T MY INSURANCE TELL ME THAT 2 WEEKS AGO??? SO NOW I HAVE TO GET THROUGH TO THEM IN THE MERE 10 MINUTES I HAVE LEFT BEFORE MY APPOIINTMENT. FINE. I CALL THEM AND OF COURSE THE DUMBASS ON THE OTHER LINE CAN NOT FIND MY DOCTOR AS A PARTICIPATING PROVIDER (HELLO, I GOT HER NAME FROM THEM IN THE FIRST F-ING PLACE) SO I GET PUT ON HOLD. 5 MINUTES LATER SHE TELLS ME SHE FOUND THE NAME AND HAD TO LOOK UP MY BENEFITS, SHE REPEATS WHAT I AM COVERED FOR AND THEN TELLS ME BEFORE SHE CAN AUTHORIZE ME HAS TO ASK ME SOME QUESTIONS. OH SHIT!!!! SO SHE ASK SOME BASICS AND OF COURSE ASKS ME IF I HAVE A MALE PARTNER THAT I INTEND TO GET PREGNANT WITH. I CONVINCE MYSELF THAT WHAT I ANSWER NEXT IS THE TRUTH BECAUSE, HELL, I NEED SPERM TO GET PREGNANT, WE ARE ONLY GONNA TRY ONE DONOR SO TECHNICALLY THAT DOES MAKE HIM MY PARTNER, RIGHT??? ANYWAY, I FINALLY GET MY AUTHORIZATION NUMBER, HANG UP, LOOK AT THE CLOCK, IT IS 2:29!!! MY HEART IS POUNDING, MY HEAD FEELS LIKE IT IS GONNA EXPLODE BUT I GOT THE INFO ON TIME. WE SPEND THE NEXT 20+ MINUTES WAITING TO SEE THE DOCTOR. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO MY 2:30 APPOINTMENT???

ANYHOO - THE DOCTOR CALLED ME AND THEN THE WHIRLWIND REALLY BEGAN. SHE WAS FINE WITH DAWN AND I BEING A COUPLE, WE TOLD HER ABOUT OUR PLANS AS FAR AS WHAT WE ARE WILLING TO DO AND FOR HOW LONG. SHE TOLD US SHE LIKED OUR ATTITUDE AND THAT IT WAS A "VERY HEALTHY" WAY TO LOOK AT THINGS. OK, WHATEVER. SHE THEN TOOK MY MED INFO, IN DETAIL AND LAID OUT OUR OPTIONS. THEN SHE GAVE ME A PHYSICAL (OF COURSE MY WEIGHT BECAME AN ISSUE THE MINUTE I STEPPED ON A SCALE, IT AMUSES ME TO SEE PEOPLE SURPRISED AT THE ACTUAL NUMBERS AFTER SPENDING HOW LONG WITH ME?!?!) THEN THE LOVELY SPECULUM MADE AN APPEARANCE. ALL SEEMED WELL ON THE "SURFACE" - THEN OFF FOR A BLOOD TEST. THE FAMOUS MIS TEST (TO CHECK THE BLOOD FOR INFO ON OVARIAN RESERVE) MY INSURANCE DOES NOT COVER THIS BUT NOT TOO BAD BECAUSE I HAVE NO OTHER CO-PAYS SO WE PAY $75 AND HEAD TO HOOTERS TO EAT AND TALK.

HERE IS THE NITTY GRITTY: (SOME MAY DISAGREE, BUT THIS WORKS FOR US, PLEASE DON'T JUDGE)

• WE LOOOOVE OUR RE - SHE IS AMAZING - I WOULD HAVE WAITED FOREVER TO SEE HER
• WE HAVE TO WAIT TWO WEEKS (OUR FIRST TWW) FOR THE MIS RESULTS
• I HAVE TO GO IN ON MONDAY FOR A PAP AND MORE BLOOD WORK
• WHATEVER CYCLE I DECIDE TO I HAVE TO DO THE 2ND DAY E2/FSH BLOODWORK
• SAME CYCLE HSG (SHE WARNED ME THIS IS NOT FUN) B/W 5-10 DAY
• AT SOME POINT THEY WOULD LIKE US TO TAKE AN ORIENTATION CLASS BEFORE BEGINNING THE IUIs
• WE ARE PROBABLY GONNA GO WITH CCB - THEY SEEM TO BE THE MOST OFTEN USED BY OUR RE AND I HAVE HEARD FAIRLY GOOD THINGS ABOUT THEM
• OUR PLACE WILL STORE FOR $500 ANNUAL - MORE EXPENSIVE THAN AT CCB BUT THEN WE DON'T HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT SHIPING B/C THE SWIMMERS WILL ALREADY BE WAITING FOR US
• SHE DOES NOT SUGGEST USING MORE THAN 1 VIAL PER CYCLE
• WE ARE MOST LIKELY GONNA TRY AT LEAST ONE ICI AT HOME
• WE ARE ONLY GONNA TRY IUI FOR A FEW MONTHS
• AT MOST WE WILL DO CLOMID OR AN INJECTION OF OVIDREL (AT HER SUGGESTION), BUT NO OTHER DRUGS
• IF FOR SOME REASON SHE FINDS SOMETHING THAT MAY PREVENT ME FROM GETTING PREGNANT, WE WILL NOT TAKE STEPS TO SURGICALLY CORRECT
• IF THAT IS THE CASE THEN WE WILL STAY WITH HER AND DAWN WILL GET CHECKED OUT TO SEE IF SHE IS AN OPTION
• IF NEITHER OF US IS AN OPTION OR WHOEVER IS DOESN'T GET PREGNANT WITHIN THE TIME WE AGREED TO GIVE OURSELVES, WE WILL BE VERRRRY SAD, BUT WE WILL CONTINUE TO BE GRATEFUL FOR THE BEAUTIFUL SONS WE HAVE.

WE'LL KEEP YOU GUYS POSTED!!!!