MIRACLES

I HAVE NEVER BEEN ONE TO BELIEVE IN MIRACLES. THAT'S TO SAY...I PRAYED FOR THEM ALL THE TIME...BUT I NEVER REALLY BELIEVED IN THEM...UNTIL NOW. FIRST OFF, WE ARE STILL PREGNANT WITH OUR LITTLE MIRACLE. THERE IS AN ACTUAL BABY IN THERE AFTER ALL THIS TIME. HOLY CRAP. WE HAVEN'T GOTTEN A CHANCE TO SEE OUR LITTLE BUG YET BUT OUR NUMBERS ARE STRONG AND STEADY AND MORE THAN DOUBLING (our 4th beta was 3822) SO WE ARE BREATHING STEADY. WE GO BACK ON MONDAY, CHRISTMAS EVE, FOR ANOTHER SET OF NUMBERS AND THEN THE FOLLOWING WEEK WOULD BE OUR FIRST SONO. THIS FERTILITY CENTER HAS YOU DO BLOOD ONLY UNTIL 7 WEEKS THEN DOES SONOS AND BLOOD UNTIL 9 WEEKS AND THEN RELEASES YOU OUT INTO THE WORLD TO SEEK YOUR OWN FORTUNE WITH AN OB. I AM PRETTY CERTAIN THAT DUE TO MY AGE, WEIGHT AND FAMILY HISTORY OF DIABETES I WILL BE CONSIDERED HIGH RISK AND SENT TO A SPECIALIST AS WELL AS A REGULAR OB - BUT THAT IS FINE - THE MORE PEOPLE LOOKING AFTER OUR BUG, THE BETTER. ANYHOW, DAWN WILL MOST DEFINITELY BE TRYING TO CON HER WAY INTO A SONO FOR ME THIS MONDAY ANYWAY. SHE REALLY WANTS A PICTURE BEFORE CHRISTMAS. I AM NOT HOLDING MY BREATHE. LOL.

IN NON BABY RELATED BUT TOTALLY MIRACLE RELATED NEWS... LAST FRIDAY, A WEEK FROM WHEN WE GOT OUR BFP - MY DAD HAD A HEART ATTACK. HE IS OK NOW. BUT IT WAS A MIRACLE THAT HE IS STILL WITH US. THERE WERE NO WARNINGS AND IT WAS TOTALLY UNEXPECTED. I AM SO GRATEFUL THAT HE IS STILL WITH US. I LOVE THAT MAN MORE THAN I COULD PUT IN WORDS. 

I WANT TO COMMENT ON THE TRAGEDY THAT HAPPENED IN CT, I HEARD ABOUT IT WHILE I WAS BEDSIDE TO MY DAD WAITING FOR HIS SURGERY...BUT I CAN'T FIND THE WORDS. I AM HEART BROKEN FOR THOSE FAMILIES AND FOR ALL OF US. IT IS A SAD WORLD WE LIVE IN WHEN PEOPLE CAN BE SO CRUEL AND DO SUCH HEINOUS THINGS. I CAN NOT IMAGINE A DAY WITHOUT MY CHILDREN, LET ALONE THE REST OF MY LIFE. LIKE EVERYONE ELSE, I AM MOURNING FOR THE LOSS OF THESE PEOPLE AND HOLDING MY CHILDREN A LITTLE CLOSER AND A LITTLE LONGER. EACH ONE OF THOSE PEOPLE WAS A MIRACLE TO THEIR FAMILIES EACH ONE OF THOSE SOULS TOUCHED SOMEONES LIFE AND MADE A DIFFERENCE. BUT EVEN MIRACLES HAVE THEIR LIMITS. I HOPE THEY ARE ALL IN A BETTER PLACE AND AT PEACE.